The genders and their 'stuff'

I know there will be people who fall outside of these generalizations that I'm about to make, but for the sake of simplicity in this post--here goes:

Women tend to have more 'fashion-oriented' stuff, and men have more 'hobby-type' stuff.

And here is what we do about that: 

Women--realize that nothing you put on your body will ever change who you are inside.

Men--realize that nothing you have to use for  ______  {fill in the blank} will ever change who you are inside.

Once we realize that who we are is not based on what we wear or what we own, life gets a whole lot simpler.

I recently read this article and it summed it up nicely.  Women tend to buy more to try to BE more...and that's exactly what our consumeristic society wants you to do.  But the message we receive from advertisers is that we're inadequate {without whatever they're selling}--not because that's the truth--but because that will make the companies a buck. It's always about profit.  Always has been, and always will be.

Once you can read between the lines (and realize the lie that you're being fed), everything makes sense and it's easier to NOT buy things thinking they will make you someone you're not.

I stopped wearing make-up over 5 years ago.  

(I didn't wear a lot to begin with, but I did actually put something on my face every day.)

No one has ever said a word to me about not wearing make-up.  Even if someone had, it wouldn't have made a difference anyway.  Sure, my skin gets a bit shiny here and there, but besides glaring a flash from my face in a random picture--it doesn't reduce my quality of life one bit.

And it saves me a whole lot of time and money every day.

{I can hear some of you gasping as you read this right now!}  

It might feel scary to do it--but I challenge every single lady reading this right now to go somewhere without any make-up on (a place you would normally wear it)--and see if you survive.  (Also, take note of how much faster you get ready!)

Then move on to clothing.

See if you can simplify what you wear for one week--then two--then three.

{And leave me a comment on the Facebook page so I know you did it!}

And now for the men...

Since I'm a woman, I can't speak from personal experience, but from what I see when helping clients organize:

Men want to keep memorabilia from their childhood--but hopefully they've grown a bit since then!  Sure, it's a nice reminder of fun times, but if it's not serving a purpose now--get rid of it.  (And please don't keep it because you're "saving it for the kids"--because they'll just keep it stored in a box and won't want to get rid of it because you gave it to them!)

Men also want to keep "manly" things like tools and gear and 'guy' stuff--even if they haven't used it in YEARS.  It doesn't make them any tougher (or smarter or stronger) just by having an accumulation of things they don't use.  

So let them go.

Like I said before: I realize these are very broad generalizations--but if you fit into one of these categories, do yourself a favor and evaluate what you have and where you'd like to spend your time.

It's worth the hard work.  I promise.

Deeper than physical clutter...

I think it's safe to say that we *all* have some clutter in our homes.
(That's why you're reading a blog called Simplify Your Stuff, right?)

So really, it's not necessarily if, but how much clutter you have that's an issue.  Unless you live alone in the woods where no one ever comes to visit you--ever--your clutter effects other people. Or maybe you're the one living with someone who has too much clutter...

In an article last year in the Wall Street Journal, titled The Psychology of Clutter, one line really resonated with me: 
'What matters is whether your habits distress you or others.'

This is when "stuff" turns into "chaos."  If you're feeling overwhelmed by piles of stuff, or bills that are overdue because you misplaced them, or find yourself running late because you can't find what you're looking for...you could be sabotaging yourself with stuff.

Things don't magically appear in your home.
You bring them in (or don't decline when others give them to you).

So the first thing to do when trying to get a grip on so much stuff: stop bringing more home!

The next step is to start clearing out the things you aren't using consistently...and to listen to the voice in your head when deciding what to do with each item:

"I might need this someday"
"________ could use this, I'll save it for her/him"
"I paid _____ amount for this, I can't just give it away"
"I might fit into this {shirt/dress/jeans/bathing suit} again one day"
"This was ______'s when s/he was a baby!"
"My mother gave me this before she passed away"
"I better save this for _________"
"This isn't trash, I'm not sending it to the landfill"
"My (spouse) would kill me if I got rid of this!"
"OH! I was looking for this!"
"Little _______ made this when s/he was ___ years old!"
"I owe how much on this credit card?"
"When we move, I will use this"
"We have the space to store this, no need to get rid of it"
"My kids will want this some day"
"______ gave me this as a gift, so I must keep it"
"I plan on fixing this and using it soon"
"This is worth some money--I'm going to sell it!"
"What if I want this after I get rid of it?"
"This is my favorite color...I have to keep it"

Clearing out your physical clutter is easy compared to dealing with the mental clutter surrounding the physical clutter!  Notice what you tell yourself, and see if you can replace your "need" to keep it, with a reason to let go of it (someone else can use it, a non-profit can use it/sell it/repurpose it, you'll have more free space without it, etc).

If bringing items into your home is a habit (shopping, thrifting, etc), you'll have to replace that habit with something else.  Volunteering {the time you would've spent shopping} at a local non-profit is an excellent way to help others in your community, keep money in your wallet, and stuff out of your home!

What's your biggest "reason to keep" something that you battle?

Living Small in a Big World

Disclaimer: I have a dream to live in a tiny house one day.

If you're not sure what a tiny house is, check out this house.

I daydream about one tiny bin of Legos, that must be meticulously picked up and stored away before we can eat lunch (because the table used for Legos is also the dining table/art table/folding laundry table...), and cleaning the entire house in 15 minutes, and packing for a trip to visit family in PA in 10 minutes--because the total amount of clothing in our house would fit in the suitcases we'd take for a week-long trip.

I know, I know, this sounds completely ridiculous to some of you!
Who would ever want to live in less than 500 square feet?

This girl.

And I'm working on my husband.  Oh yes, he will live tiny one day...he's all for it--once the kids move out.  But they're 9 and 4--and I don't want to wait that long!  I overheard our 4 year old telling a friend one day, "When we live in a tiny house, we won't have this anymore" (about one of her toys)...

The kids play more with less toys.

We downsized from 1400 square feet to 900...and we have extra space in our house!

We wiped out over half of the toys--and simplified them into categories (books, art stuff, blocks/marble run, dress-up, animal figures, and Legos--my nemesis!).

We have 2 closets: one that holds all of the kids' clothing, and the other that holds all of the adult clothing (with a dresser in there).

Our kitchen only contains the essential dishes and bakeware.

The only bathroom contains items that are used on a daily basis...and that's it.

Our living and dining areas have simple, useful things in them...and yes, they acquire clutter when we get lazy and don't put things away, but when the house is clean and things are in their places, these areas are free of lots of "stuff."

Now, am I advocating for everyone to sell all of their stuff and live in the shed out back?  NO.

I'm suggesting that you become aware of the many, many ads that are designed to make you think you need their product--that your life will be happier, easier, faster, better--if you buy it.  Once you become aware of the marketing that's used to tell us we need to have something, you can begin to resist it.

To live with less clutter, stop buying more stuff.
Then get rid of things that are broken.
Then donate the items you no longer use but are still in useable condition.
Then sell the items that are still in great condition (and may still have tags on them!).
Then be honest and get rid of things that you're keeping "just in case" you might use them.
You're not.  Let them go.

And slowly, over time, your home will only contain the useful, beautiful items that you appreciate...and you'll resist buying things to make yourself feel better, because you'll see that things don't make you feel better.

They require work.

You have to work to make the money to buy the things--then you have to take care of the things--then you feel like you need to replace the things with newer versions of the things--and the cycle repeats itself.

Free yourself of non-essential stuff and see how good it feels.

Shopping in Your Closet!

That's the trick to getting rid of unused clothing...go shopping in your closet!

Go through every single item and ask yourself: "If I were shopping right now, would I buy this?"

If the answer is no...get rid of it!

Downsizing your wardrobe can be a very difficult--yet freeing--experience when it comes to simplifying your stuff.  You think about how much you paid for that shirt (shoes, pants, fill in the blank)...or the special occasion you wore that dress to (10 years ago!)...or when you'll fit back into those jeans...or that suit that you'll wear again--someday.  

But if you look at what you actually wear--today--you'll see that it's a very small amount.

The are many benefits to owning less clothing:

• More money in your pocket
• Less laundry to wash, dry, fold, and put away
• More closet space
• Less time to get ready in the morning
• More mental clarity
• Less clutter!

You can take baby steps and challenge yourself to get rid of one piece of clothing per day for one month (or week!) and repeat it until you feel like you've pared it down to just what you wear.  

(There is some truth to the saying "we use 20% of our stuff 80% of the time"!)

Or, you can just go big right out of the gate and take the 333 Challenge!

Whether you get rid of 10 things or 100...I promise you, you will feel the space that it frees up in your life...both physically and mentally!

I have yet to do the 333 Challenge, but I did severely reduce my wardrobe to this:

(This is my clothing and my husband's...but his shoes are under the bed.)

Tackle Your Laundry Piles Once & For All!

Ahhhh laundry...clean, dirty, wet, dry...it never ends!

Sick of having piles of laundry everywhere?

Would you like to sit on that chair/couch/recliner again?

Do you have trouble finding specific things you want to wear?

Do you procrastinate on washing, drying, folding, or putting away?

All four?

There is one simple solution to end your laundry misery: do one load every day.

That's it!  For real.

One single load of laundry--start to finish--every day...and no more piles everywhere!

Of course, there will be times when you just have to do more than one load of laundry
(returning from a trip, a kiddo wet the bed, guests used lots of towels, etc), but for the most part,
you can get your system to run smoothly doing only one load at a time.

I've been doing this for several months now and it's working out quite nicely!

I was the "never put it away" laundry slacker.  

I LOVE to hang laundry on the clothesline to dry...so washing it and hanging it outside was not the problem.  Getting it down and putting it away?  Forget it.  I can't even count how many times I left a load (or 3) hanging out on the clothesline.  Oops.

If I limit myself to only doing one load per day--it gets washed, dried, folded and put away!  Hurray!  

I also severely downsized my wardrobe, both kids' wardrobes, and partly my husband's

(still working on that one!)...but that's a story for another post :)

Eco-friendly clothes dryer...and my mini-meditation time.